So one of my molars shattered Monday night and I’ve been a bit distracted since then.
I’ve also been practicing my from-the-hip shooting. Here’s the image that turned out the best.
I was born at a very early age and some years after that I was a child with horrible teeth. Turns out I had more teeth than jaw to put them on so things needed pulling. The teeth that remained had lots and lots of cavities that needed filling. I was pretty shitty at hygiene. At the time it didn’t matter because all children are runny and gross. Once I hit puberty it turned out that no one wants to have sex with you when you stink. Whoopsie! I had to start washing behind my ears. I also didn’t wear my glasses as a child so the corrective surgery that straightened out my lazy eye failed and my eye eventually returned to it’s position of confusing people about who I’m talking to. Basically I was an idiot kid with bad genetics. Now I’m a slightly less idiotic adult with fucked-up-not-as-badly-as-it-could-have-been teeth. I may not have a lot to put on my tombstone, but at least I can have “Had bad teeth and a lazy eye, but he was never a Gamergater”
Here’s another from the hip shot. This is the second best one.
Getting back to the tooth: At the time it was common practice to fill molars in a cross shaped pattern. No one knew until years later that this method weakens molars, causing them to crack and eventually break. I first found out about this about ten years ago while eating a Whopper in Itaewon. Something hard and pointy was in the chemical mush they call a paddy and I was thinking, “I’m gonna sue Burger King for putting a cog in my meat.” Pulling it out I quickly realized that it was a tooth. Wanting to make sure it was my tooth and not someone else’s… because that would be *WAY GROSS*… I poked around with my tongue.
After I woke up from passing out from the pain of poking an exposed nerve I raced to a dentist who explained this to me. He also told me that the three other molars that had the cross filling are showing signs of cracking and it’s only a matter of time before they all shatter like grenades, sending shrapnel into my brain and killing me. I never got them all filed and crowned because while I could afford to do the broken one, all four was beyond my financial abilities. I got the gold crown and proceeded to take my chances.
The gold crown fell out months later and vanished into ocean along with my poo. The next tooth took a decade to explode. That too has entered the ocean floating in my poo. I’m okay with this because I’m at that age where you’re happy to poo because the alternative is a cycle of painful constipation and painful diarrhea. This is also the age you have to give up on love and companionship because no one wants to fuck a man whose life is based around his bowel movements. Well, no one you’d want to kiss afterwards.
Here’s the third best from the hip photo I took.
The secret to from the hip seems to be wide angled lenses. Which would explain how all of the street photography I see is usually with a wide-angled lens. Take in everything and crop out all of the empty sky. Works for me. Except my wide-angle is also the kit lens. Kit lenses are pretty good for just about everything you need to do but they… or at least Pentax’s kit lens… Is a bit slow on the auto focus. I know that I really should stop being lazy and get good at zone focusing so I can leave the auto focus out all together but I think you’re expecting too much from a man with one eye and no teeth.